Many women, even strong and independent, satisfied with life, career and family, sooner or later come to the conclusion that they lacking one small detail for complete happiness, namely love to themselves. In the twenty-first century to love yourself, more than ever. Self-esteem and gratitude - this is a success engine and a fundamental factor of happiness. But little to realize this need, you need to understand what to do in order to love yourself and become happy.
For no reason, they say that while we do not learn to love ourselves, we will not be able to love others. In the modern world there are a lot of people who cannot understand themselves and come completely illogical to other people. According to such people, their eyes, according to the words and gestures, it is immediately seen how much they are in the freaks with themselves, and, in truth, you want to stay away from them, and where to help them.
To love yourself, especially a girl, it is important and necessary, if only because:
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In the life of many women, the word "must" stands above the word "want". Of course, there should be a framework for reasonable, but what would Cinderella would have achieved if she didn't put one time in his life "Want" higher than "necessary"? It doesn't matter what your goal is to marry a prince, to keep the one with which you are already married, or just stop every morning to turn away by passing by the mirror. You need to love yourself for many purposes and learn this is actually easy.
As in many methods of self-development and solving problems, understanding the cause is the first step towards success. It is important to understand why you are not experiencing special love to work right with it. The reasons for dislike can be different and most often purely individual, but mostly they are divided into such categories as:
Of course, besides the above, there may be other reasons known only to you. If you want to love yourself, trying little to make it all available in the recommendations of psychologists in ways, you need to also really understand the reason why it does not work.
Read books about improving self-esteem, pass the tests or contact a psychologist's specialist in order to place points over I, and work on love for yourself will be much easier.
Go to any bookstore, find the shelf with psychological books - among them there is a whole bunch of guides on how to find our place in life, love yourself and be happy. If they brighten them all to the table of contents, the essence will be reduced to about the same list of principles that psychologists speak of the whole world.
In order to love yourself, it is necessary not only to understand, but also make simple things that help become happier.
Have a high self-esteem and love yourself - this is not exactly the same. You can be confident in all your actions and fully justify and support yourself, while being deeply opposed to yourself. However, only units are able to love themselves, while evaluating themselves extremely negative. Both of these extremes bordered with mental deformation, so it is important to comply with a clear balance, as well as to remember the difference between a sense of self-esteem and a sense of self-esteem.
The feeling of self-esteem means the desire to be important to others and feel better than you are, whereas a sense of self-esteem is a strict framework permitted with respect to others and respect yourself.
So, first of all it is necessary to work on self-esteem. For this, there is a wide selection of psychological exercises, the whole essence of most of which comes down to one plan:
All this will help increase self-esteem, and with good self-esteem to love himself much easier.
In 1952, Norman Vincent Pil published his book "The Power of Positive Thinking", the purpose of which was to help people with heavy diseases and various difficulties in life to understand the relationship of "faith in the best" and happy cure. To this day, this book is published and reprinted: more than five million copies of more than dozen languages \u200b\u200bhave been released.
What is the power of positive thinking? In the fact that, thanks to this book, at least a few million people on the planet know exactly, the phrase "Believe in the best and the best will come" is not a joke. A positive attitude to life and really change it for the better, giving the forces not to give up before difficulties and go to the intended goal in the world and harmony.
Of course, with low self-esteem, the first stick in wheels will cause a full loss of positive in thinking. Therefore, it is necessary to work on these two things at the same time not to grasp the difficulties and believe in yourself.
To think positively is important, but even more important - to emphasize your attention on good. Get yourself a notebook in which mark the most positive things that happen to you. Take pictures of bright moments. Try a week not to write, not to tell and not complain about anyone on bad events, try to remember only good.
Our problem is that when you dug on the bad, we leave a good way overboard. From this, hands are lowered and we get dishes themselves. In your hands, change this circumstance - refund from the negative. Pay attention to only those things that raise your self-esteem and cause joy from our own actions. So you will love yourself much faster than if you worry about every error or an unpleasant incident.
Remember your childhood, how others belong to you: Mom, Dad, Grandma, Grandfather. Everyone tried to please you, little, to do something for you, please something nice. Why did you stop doing this in adulthood for yourself? Maybe too often heard phrases: "You never know what you want there, you need it" or "I also want a lot of things, you will move?". Or accustomed to the fact that others love you, and did not learn?
In childhood, simple things I wanted somehow different: to run on the dese of bare heels, get a balloon with a heart, dress up in my mother's shoes and cut in front of the mirror. In adulthood, we somehow avoid thinking about simple and natural desires, replacing them with duties that urgently need to fulfill.
Stay for a second, take a piece of paper and write down the three simplest desires that you want to fulfill today.
For example: eat ice cream, take a walk in the park, buy a new blouse. Even if there is no desire - come up with them. Hormone of happiness, which produces the body when performing something conceived, supports you in physical form and gives you not only external, but also inner beauty, which is much more important.
Suppose the girl's dress is prettier and smiles at a little sincere. Just? Perhaps. But someone Donald Fisterstone in 1996 was awarded Schnobelevskaya (yes, not Nobel) award for the invention of plastic pink flamingos. Just? Not? Why?
Because people are different. And to compare a passerby girl in a dress from Couture with the inventor of pink flamingo from plastic - illogical as well as to compare you with someone else. Everyone has their own pros, cons, priorities and skills. Everyone is proud of what he thinks needs, and envies those who need it necessary, but it is unlikely that Donald Fisorstone compared himself with a model from the show in Milan.
Develop. But do not do it in order to surpose someone else, it may be that there was no one to replay. Develop in order to become better than you were before.
Promotion is one of the main methods of education of both children and adults. Praise herself, even mentally, for successful accomplishments, we raise our self-esteem, and a little encouragement in the form of pleasant little things or your favorite delicacy increases a positive effect.
Use any moment to achieve success, even the smallest - it enhances the mood and self-esteem. If you know that applying efforts, you can do something that you will be grateful for yourself, do it and be grateful. A smile will appear on the face, your eyes will take place in the mirror, and it wanted to live a little more stronger. Even simple homework: Washing dishes, a cleaned room, written by verse or article that has long been asked to the keyboard, give you strength and joy - what is vital to love yourself.
Let us give an example: Nikolai Vasilyevich Gogol took and burned the second volume of "dead souls". If you omit doubts about the very existence of a second volume and take the assumption that he did because he didn't like it, although he worked for quite a long time, what will remain? Millions of readers who later spare about the fact that the magnificent work has never succeeded.
Of course, we have already said that it is not worth comparing ourselves with others, but the principle remains the principle: if something does not go out, you should not go to extremes, scolding yourself for it and punish. Everything is mistaken. It does not work for everyone. But only wise and self-confident people can relate to the failures of philosophically, without paying for them and not reducing self-esteem.
Work, family, children, cleaning, cooking, ironing - in fuss and running We often forget that there is always someone else who needs to pay attention - we ourselves. There will always be urgent and important cases, urgent events and the tasks of a global scale, trying to break between all very easily forget about themselves.
Pause at least once a day - a small one, and at least once a week - great. Abstract from the whole universe with a cup of tea on the balcony or with a favorite bike in the park. Let me not think about anything, do not touch yourself, give time to yourself with your beloved and enjoy your society. This will help you understand yourself, relax and tune in to positive way.
The fact that scientists have proven that physical exercises increase efficiency, everyone knows. You will be surprised, but they also help to love themselves. And not only in the sense that the beautiful figure causes joy and happiness, but also in the fact that morning gymnastics charges energy for the whole day. Cheerfulness helps to make important things, and the successes help to love themselves.
Cut more time outdoors. Start running in the morning. Buy rollers and once a week are chosen on the rollerl. Sign up in the gym. The movement activates the brain, concentrates the thought process and launches the production of joy hormones, and further improves health.
If you have been trying to love yourself for a long time, and despite all attempts, you have badly out, then look around, can your surroundings prevent you from? Or is it simply not?
Find new friends - always a good idea, but find new friends who will teach you a new one and will give positive emotions - vital to understand and love yourself. It is not always worth looking for a friendship, go to seminars and courses, attend interesting events and listen to the lecturers telling about the positive sides of life. It will help you feel a little more lively and captivate your thoughts into a new course.
Think that you prevent you from loved you right now, especially if in principle it suits you and you have achieved a lot, but you do not feel any love. Maybe you were all my life for yourself, solved all the problems on our own and always took over all the responsibility, but I sometimes wanted to stay a little girl and ride a swing while someone is preparing dinner? Or, on the contrary, the surroundings consider you the misinterpretation, and you always wanted to try myself as a leader?
Try to put yourself a little to another position. Lightly change the vector of your activity, unzip fists or, on the contrary, become on your feet. This will not only shake you, but also will make it clear what you really don't have enough to reach harmony with yourself.
If you have long wanted to change something in myself, my appearance, behavior, thinking, why not do this. Only first ask yourself a question: why do you want to do it? Because you yourself want or because you think that so you will like others more?
Stop changing for others, change for yourself if you think it is necessary. The whole world will not be noticed if you change something in yourself. And if notice, it is unlikely to fully appreciate. Only one person will be grateful for this - you yourself.
Loving someone is much easier than to love yourself. Separately, all the ways seem simple, but in the aggregate they constitute a long, complex and responsible process of work on themselves.
Perhaps, many cannot love themselves just because it seems very difficult. However, everything becomes much easier if you understand the simple thing: with each step, made to meet the desired inner harmony, it becomes much easier.
How to love yourself: Ten steps to love for yourself (according to the generally accepted method of Louise Hay):
1. The most important moment in the science of love is most likely a refusal of self-criticism. When we tell ourselves that nothing terrible is happening, then, regardless of the circumstances, everything can be easily changed and fixed. And when we believe that everything is bad, difficulties are found at every step. We all change without exception. Every day is a new day. And today we are already doing a little bit like yesterday. In the ability to adapt and move forward along with life stream is our strength.
6. Love yourself - it means to find a support. Go to your friends and ask for help. Please assist in a difficult moment - this is a manifestation of not weakness, but forces. Many of us are accustomed to being arrogant and rely only on themselves. You do not appeal for help because you do not allow your ego. But, instead of trying to dig up alone, and then be angry with my own impotence, it is better to ask for help.
7. Love your troubles and disadvantages. Everything is negative in us and in life in general - only part of the grand general plan. Part of the program of the Universe. The Universal Mind, creating humanity, can not hate us for making mistakes or be angry with their children. The universal mind knows that we are trying our best, and supports us with your love.
Each of us is once mistaken and makes the wrong choice. However, if we constantly punish yourself for your mistakes, then such a model of behavior gradually enters the habit and it becomes quite difficult to refuse. At the same time, everything is more difficult to make a positive choice. If you repeat without tired: "I hate my work. I hate my house. I hate my illness. I hate my relationship. I hate all this, "it is unlikely to count on a happy life.
Remember that no hard or unpleasant situation arises by chance. For each of them something costs. Some very serious reason. Dr. John Harrison, the author of the book "Love your illness," believes that people should not condemn themselves for their ailments or the operations suffered.
In fact, you need to congratulate yourself with the disease, as it serves as a reliable tip when choosing a life path. It should be understood that any problem is directly related to our view of life: we contribute to the creation of problems trying to control certain situations. Once realizing it, we will be able to find a way out of the situation without prejudice to health.
For many people who suffered subsequently with cancer or other incurable diseases, it is very characteristic of the inability to speak "no" authorities. Saying "no", they experience such torments that the program of destruction may be originated at the subconscious level, which will say "no" for them.
I was familiar with a woman who, realizing the causes of his illness, refused to unquestionably obey the demands of the father and first began to live for themselves. At first she was incredibly difficult to say "no", but after a while she gladly discovered that he learned and what he recover.
Whatever we have negative stereotypes of thinking and behavior, we can always learn how to find a way out of the situation. That is why it is important to ask yourself the next question: "What will this situation lead to? What I will carry out of it? Will my experience be positive? " We do not like to ask yourself such questions. However, if we really want to learn about them and look inside them, we will find out the truth.
For example, the answer may be like this: "Only so I manage to achieve your spouse." Realizing this, you can think about how to get the same result with other, less dangerous methods.
Humor is one of the possible means of recovery. It helps to release pain and tension from herself and, thus, it is easier to survive the stressful situation. We in Heyraide are given a special time for jokes. Sometimes we invite to themselves "Lady-Smeshka".
She has such a contagious laughter that no one can remain serious in her presence. It is impossible to perceive everything very close to the heart, and, moreover, laughter has an amazing healing force. I advise you more often to watch old filmcomy when you are in a bad mood.
8. Take care of your body. Treat body as a wonderful home in which you are destined to live for a while. You would love this house, would take care of him, right? To begin with, it is worth paying attention to what you will lose your body.
Currently, drugs and alcohol have received very large propagation - the two most popular treatments from reality. If you use drugs, it does not mean that you are a nikudy man. This means only one thing: you have not yet found another way to cope with your problems.
Drugs Manyat you: "Take us! We will have a great time. " And it is true. You can find yourself in the seventh heaven. However, drugs are so much distorting your reality, which ultimately will have to pay for this terrible price. After you have taken narcotic drugs for some time, health begins to deteriorate sharply.
First of all, the immune system suffers, which leads to the development of many different diseases. In the future, you can no longer abandon drug. Therefore, before taking them, you need to ask yourself what pushes you to this risky step. Maybe you have a difficult period and you want to distract? As for constant use and drug addiction, this is already a completely different story.
I have never ever been met with a person who would sincerely loved himself and, at the same time, took drugs. Drugs and alcohol is an attempt to get rid of a sense of own inferiority, which we carried with you from childhood.
When the state of narcotic intoxication passes, we feel even worse than before. Moreover, we additionally climb the feeling of guilt. We still have to find out that it is not necessary to hide from feelings. Feel is safe. In addition, any feelings are sooner or later.
Another evidence of dislike for yourself is wrong. We can't live without food, because it is fuel for our body. Without it, there was no development of new cells. But even if we are familiar with the basics of proper nutrition, you still use such products that harm our health and lead to obesity. Even future doctors do not teach the basics of proper nutrition. Well, if a medical student himself expresses the desire to familiarize himself with this subject optional. What is customary to call traditional medicine is mainly based on treatment with medicines and surgical intervention. Knowledge on the basics of proper nutrition can only be obtained independently, according to your own. Attentive attitude towards food and his health is a manifestation of love for itself. If in an hour after breakfast begins to clone into sleep, ask yourself what you ate. Perhaps it was something, with which your body cannot cope in the morning. Pay attention to those products that give you energy, as well as on those that take it.
In this case, you can act in the method of trial and errors. In addition, it is worth consulting a good specialist who will answer all your questions.
9. I often emphasize the importance of working with a mirror. This is a very good way to find out what exactly keeps us from love to yourself. There are several ways to work with a mirror. Here, for example, one of my favorites. In the morning you need to go to the mirror first and say, looking at reflection: "What can I do for you today? What gives you pleasure and benefit? " And then you need to listen carefully to the response of an internal voice. Follow it with advice during the day. It happens that some failed to wait for the answer. This is due to the fact that before that they scolded themselves too much: the inner voice is still not used to responding to affectionate words, full of love. If there is something unpleasant during the day with you, go to the mirror and tell me: "I still love you." All events have the beginning and the end, but your love is infinite, and this is the most important thing. And if something good happens, take a look at your reflection in the mirror again and say: "Thank you." Be appreciated for happiness. Standing in front of the mirror, you can learn forgiveness. Try to forgive yourself and others. Looking in the mirror, you can talk with those with whom you do not decide to communicate with an eye on the eye.
You can find out relationships with parents, bosses, doctors, children, lovers. You can just say what you were afraid to say in another setting. And remember that in the end you always need to ask your "interlocutors" about love and approval, because it is in this that you need.
People who do not feel love to themselves, as a rule, do not know how to forgive. There is a direct relationship: not aware, do not love. When we are goodbye and let go from ourselves, we discard the unbearable wear from our shoulders and open the heart of love. People say: "Even on the soul it is easier!" Of course, because they just got rid of such gravity! Dr. John Harrison believes that, asking himself and his parents, letting himself from herself all the offenses of the past years, a man treats his body as not under one antibiotic.
You need to try to have your children to cease to love you. But if this happens, they will be forgiven with great difficulty. When we can not forgive, we cannot let offense from ourselves, the past displaces the present from our life. If we do not live in the present, how can we build our future? Old trash from the past can turn into a disgusting landfill.
It is very useful to pronounce in front of the mirror of affirmation. So you learn to recognize the truth about yourself. If in response to affirmation from the inside, a grumpy voice comes: "Are you kidding? It is not true. You do not deserve this, "consider that we got a valuable gift. Changes are impossible until you know what exactly you need to work.
The grinding of fake inner voices is actually the key to finding freedom. Answer the negative installation of a positive statement: "Now I deserve all the best. I allow pleasant and useful experiences to fill my life. " Repeat this statement until it becomes part of your life.
I saw, as literally, families are changing in front of the eyes, in which at least one person is engaged in affirmations. Many who come to us in Heyraid, houses reign very cool relationships. Well, let's say, parents refuse to talk with children. In this case, we offer the following affirmation: "I have wonderful, warm, open relationships of love and trust with each member of my family, including mom."
Affirmation can be changed, depending on the specific problem. I advise: Every time the thought of a family or some of her members comes to mind, it is necessary to approach the mirror and repeat this affirmation again. And how nice, when after three, or six, or nine months at the meetings, parents themselves begin to appear.
10. And finally, love yourself now. Do not wait until you still get to get. Eternal dissatisfaction with itself is just a habit. If you can be satisfied with him now, if you can love right now and approve yourself, then you are ready to enjoy the good things that will become part of your life. Having learned to love yourself, you can love and take others.
We cannot change other people, therefore, leave them alone. Trying someone to change, we spend a lot of energy. If we spent at least half of it, they would have been completely different. And of course, we would have an absolutely different attitude.
You can't teach someone to live. Everyone must find their own way. Everything that is available to you is to know yourself. And love for yourself is the first step in this direction. It helps to resist the destructive impacts that some people can have on you.
If there is a situation in which you will have to face a person configured against any change for the better, then just love yourself, love yourself to truly, and fate will take all trouble from you.
What I say will add out a little simplistic. Nevertheless, I am ready to repeat again and again, that the most effective way to avoid problems is to love yourself as we are. I truly believe it. Vibrations of love emanating from us will attract us loving people.
(Based on the materials of the book Louise Hay - heal their lives)
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Rating 4.81 (13 votes)A person suffering from a low self-esteem cannot normally communicate with other people and spends the lion's time on self-vaccination, continuing to turn new complexes. Because of dislike, the dreams of a happy life remain unrealized. In order to love himself and forever get rid of prejudices, often imposed from the outside, it is necessary to get acquainted with the projective mechanisms of the psyche and master a number of psychological skills.
It will be quite problematic to change the attitude towards himself for the better, really without understanding that it was that the development of such dislike was promoted. According to psychologists, the cause of this kind of autoagression is most often becoming psychological trauma received in childhood.
Many of those who categorically do not want to take themselves as it is, in one way or another it was subjected to ridicule and insults from peers, felt unnecessary in the classroom. All this certainly cannot but affect the self-esteem of the child. He does not understand why the guys ignore him. If a person, being an adult, still can't get rid of these unpleasant memories, then, most likely, the root of dislike for himself lies here.
Sometimes the situation aggravate parents. They strongly try to motivate their families to new accomplishments, and with absolutely good intentions, however, they face the opposite result. For example, constantly comparing his own child with more successful children in all respects, they apply a crushing blow to his self-esteem. Defeated by moral support and caressing baby, matured, begins to suffer because of misappling himself.
The unsuccessful experience of communicating with representatives of the opposite sex is another factor provoking a negative attitude towards himself. For some unrequited love, it becomes an invaluable lesson, and for others, with a grave of his soulful and reason for experiences about its inferiority. An abandoned person often blame himself in everything, believing that he is not enough or not possessing any qualities that his former partner appreciates.
Sometimes the beliefs of a person simply do not fit in the spirit of time. Modern society is arranged in such a way that everyone is trying to meet fashion trends, competing in success. If a person falls out of the total mass, it is possible that he will not be able to love himself. So, the girl who is not aspiring to build a successful career, and who wants to quickly go under the crown and cook the narrowed borschi may experience some difficulties with the adoption of their own values.
Dislikes are noticeable to her naked eye. She reads in a manner to hold on and talking, look, gait. To suspect a person in too negative attitudes to his own persona, according to the following features:
This list can be continued to infinity, because there is an indispensable number of manifestations of dislike for yourself. All individually.
It should be said that not always the depreciation of his personality affects all areas of life: sometimes it appears more on a professional field, and sometimes - in amur affairs.
To begin to love yourself, it is impossible to sit back and wait for the situation itself radically change. Need to collect all the will in the fist and act. The surest solution is - seek help to an experienced psychotherapist. If there is no such possibility, you should not despair. At root, the advice of specialists can help themselves, with whom you can find, discovering a study guide on practical psychology.
It so happened that society would blow people who openly express such feelings as anger, resentment, indignation. Many men and women since childhood are accustomed to not expose their emotions, preferring to accumulate them in themselves. It is very important to learn how to allow yourself to feel what worries at a particular point, as well as correctly present it to others.
For example, the girl awkwardly abandoned the word offended his friend. As a habit, I want to immediately burrow the insanity of the deeper, so as not to light the fire enmity. This position is not always relevant. As you know, emotions are natural, and if they arose, then, most likely, the situation has disposed to their appearance. If the girlfriend really led themselves inappropriate, you should specify it. Perhaps she does not suspect that her words could hurt for living.
Without the ability to let go of the past is impossible to achieve sincere equilibrium, - unanimously declare experts in the field of psychology. It is quite simple to do it - it is necessary to carefully analyze the unsuccessful experience, feel your attitude towards a negative situation, and then safely forget everything. Located on the past, which cannot be changed, the person tramples in place and does not work on its development.
Often a long experience due to missed opportunities, wasted time spent or committed errors leads to an impassive feeling of guilt and does not allow to develop love for yourself, as a result of which its own authority is undermined - almost a key factor in the formation of a psychologically sustainable person who knows the price.
It is important to clearly realize its place in this world that philosophically treat any trouble and obstacles found in the life path.
Surely everyone at least once thought, what people surround him. Is it comfortable in their presence? Do they give a charge of positive emotions or, on the contrary, act in the role of energy vampires, sow doubts and weaken the desire for self-improvement? Is there any understanding of how these people were near and why they do not disappear anywhere?
It is necessary to say goodbye to people, communication with which is caused by psychological discomfort, or to reduce contacts to a minimum if interactions with them require professional activities. This is a time-consuming, but quite feasible task.
You need to communicate with those who radiate positive and inspires useful things. With them, everyone wants to take an example and change for the better.
Very often, dislike for themselves is explained by displeasure to appearance. Moreover, it can be as a real problem, so fetched. The type of figure is laid genetically, but each is able to make maximum effort to ensure that the body is healthy and well-groomed.
Many appearance lights can easily be hidden by the right selection of clothing suitable for the body, using cosmetics. It is important to pay due attention to your appearance. Not necessarily be dressed with needles. The main thing is that the findings of the wardrobe like and add to their owner of confidence. It is worth trying to carve out the time to make a hairstyle, apply makeup before going out into the street. A pleasant aroma of toilet water and beautiful accessories are guaranteed to inspire, improve the mood and raise the spirit.
In the arsenal of psychologists there are quite a few receptions that eventually make a person will love themselves. Special attention is paid to so-called affirmations - short phrases containing a verbal formula, repeating which can be consolidated by the desired installation on the subconscious level, thereby improving psycho-emotional background. By resorting to such a self-alignment technique, you can achieve positive shifts for several weeks.
With the help of affirmation, a person can quickly learn to see his strengths and feel comfort, staying in that body in which he was born. To do this, he needs to regularly speak out loud phrases, where he convinces itself in the following circumstances:
Another exercise that guarantees an impressive result is that a person in detail represents how his life will look like when he loves himself. Auxiliary questions will help cause the desired image:
Having answered these and other questions, you need to draw this picture in the mind and consider it from all sides by adding odors and sounds to the fictional image. Staying in this state, you should listen to the inner sensations. Performing this exercise on a regular basis, a person will be the one who he wants to be in reality is confident and loving himself.
The ability to love ourselves is a basis, thanks to which you can later learn how to give heat to others and take love from others. If you do not master this art, the source of own feelings will be blocked, and a person will lose its "I" behind the chapter of fake masks.
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Psychologists are much and often talking about the need to love themselves. Experts are convinced that it is necessary for the proper formation of a full person. But what is love for yourself? Perhaps in ensuring a comfortable existence? But will this not be a manifestation of egoism in relation to loved ones? There are many diverse issues requiring an answer.
So how to love yourself and increase self-esteem to a woman? Why do the complexes appear? Are they objective? So, let's understand how to love yourself and what are the ways to normalize self-esteem?
Statistics argue that almost half of women experiences discontent with themselves, with their appearance, some features of the nature or quality of life, which becomes the cause of many complexes and depression. They do not know how to love and appreciate themselves. How then a woman can expect recognition and understanding from others?
Love for yourself does not mean neglect of loved ones. This desire to be better, smarter, more beautiful, to succeed in life. It will fill faith in itself and the conviction in the bright future.
No one is able to know and be able to all, even the most beautiful, rich and famous. Each person has errors in life, maybe irreparable. He forgives them to other people, why can't you forgive yourself? It should be learn to not be done in the future, but not to torment the idea that nothing to fix nothing. We must be able to let go of the past by making the necessary conclusions.
Pity gives birth to a feeling of helplessness and hopelessness. Even the man deprived of nature, a disabled person can find himself in this life, if it has enough will. Why regret yourself healthy, pretty and full forces to a woman?
Neoconated cases indicate weakness, defeat, inability to fight difficulties.
Every woman is unique in their own way. It is better to compare yourself today with yesterday's and marking positive changes. It is worthwhile to praise yourself for the successes achieved, even the smallest. It is even more useful to record them. Every day they will increase, and at the same time there will be confidence in their own forces. It is necessary to celebrate only their advantages. There are all the disadvantages of all, so you do not need to dwell on them.
Choosing a lesson in the shower, a woman reaches much more success. They are painted, add confidence in their abilities, remove negative emotions.
How to accept yourself and what is the technique that helps to love yourself? There are several simple exercises that should be performed daily:
A woman gets from the world a mirror reflection of those emotions and the relationship that she feels and sends him. And love for him fills her joyful, positive feelings. At the same time, it is not necessary to confuse self-esteem with pity or egoism. After all, there are two types of such feelings.
Both types of self-esteem contradict real. In order to make it adequate, first of all, you need to recognize this contradiction. How can you love yourself, being selfish or insecure?! Of course, it is impossible.
Psychology has different methods of improving self-esteem. One of them suggests look at yourself from the side, both on an unfamiliar person, and find real features causing respect. This requires the following actions.
These simple exercises will help love themselves, and will continue not only mental, but also physical health.
It is important to attribute to the world around the world, that is, to those events, people, things and circumstances, among whom a woman lives. This is a reality that gives joy and chagrins, and it is necessary to be grateful for life. After all, there is no other world and will not. You can not condemn other people: familiar, relatives, colleagues. For their decisions and their actions, they must answer themselves.
If something annoying is annoying, you need to analyze your behavior. It is believed that those properties of the character that a person condemns in others is present in it itself, so they hurt it. We must try to correct them in yourself or have to put up with them in others. Having accepted its shortcomings and having ceased to criticize himself, it is easier to cope with the complexes, lift a self-esteem.
Thus, giving good and love to the world around the world, it is possible to get more of the same.
If you look for the origins of dislike for yourself, you often have to go back to your childhood. Typically, the reasons lie in the plane of the relationship between parents with daughters and sons. Trying to see your dreams embodied through children, many moms and dads have excessive pressure on them. Hazard on parents sometimes passes through many years.
To get rid of this destructive emotion, you need to learn to forgive - and their parents, and themselves, and other people. How to learn to take yourself, your mother and dads as they are all? Psychologists offer for this implementation of the following actions.
In relations with their parents, we must try to form a positive overall memory, it will help to forget and forgive child's offenses. It is worth trying to open your emotions, not accusing anyone. Joint discussion of the solar disorders will help get rid of many complexes. If parents are no longer alive, we must try to reproduce this conversation in imagination and forgive them.
How to love yourself? To do this, you need to learn to be grateful and yourself, and this world. It is important to find a little reason for joy every day. Gratitude phrases can be recorded and reading them at any convenient time. Thoughts are material, so they should always be positive.
Often women are trying to push off, drive those memories that cause pain. They want to get rid of the experiences, however, sadness and longing are returned with even greater force. But these feelings can not be ignored, they must be survived, to then squeeze out of the head.
There are some more useful tips to help understand how to love yourself a woman:
Knowing how to accept himself, will be able to learn to love, forgive and see itself and the world as they are. As a result, you can safely look into the future. It will be wonderful and will give in response to good and recognition.
Dreams of happy and full-fledged life can remain unrealized for years. Most people suffering from misfortune to themselves cannot communicate normally with others and spend the lion's share of the self-fighting time, continuing to find flaws. Taking yourself a magical way changes life at the root, opening endless possibilities.
People understand what to get acquainted is simple and pleasant, and live without thoughts about your imperfection is much easier. Changing radically, many will even be survived from why they were pretty "how to love themselves?" There are uncomplicated advice, thanks to which any can take themselves.
This may seem a challenging task, however, the dislike for oneself is not taken from nowhere. As experience shows, most often the root of such a hostility from childhood.
Many of those who are experiencing problems with making themselves have been traveled at school. Eater ridicule of peers, boycott, feeling superfluous in class. All this is much hurting for children and adolescents. They do not understand why peers reject them. Why others become popular, are considered pets of students and teachers. If a person is familiar with these sensations, he still remembers the school with a shudder, then, most likely, the reason for dislike for himself lies in this.
Sometimes the oils poured into the fire. Wishing a child only good, they are trying to new accomplishments. But phrases like "But Olya again received a diploma for winning the Olympics, and you?" Or "Dima learns better for all subjects" most often do not encourage the child to do something, but destroy his self-esteem. Parents should not behave so that Choo is trying to earn their love.
A priori child should be loved, feel the support of the closest people, whatever it does, regardless of his success and failures. Unfortunately, not all parents understand it, later sincerely wondering why their son or daughter suffer because of the defeat of themselves and.
Unsuccessful relationships, especially the first, is another reason for dislike for yourself. Untreated feelings, probably, were almost all, only for someone they became experienced, and for someone - painful memories and reason for experiences about their own flaws. People from whom their beloved are often confident that the reason lies in them. They were not attentive enough, not sufficiently beautiful, not enough. Few people make a correction to other factors. If, even after many years, a person cannot forget the long-time romance, Coris himself and believes that unworthy to be beloved, then it is clearly necessary to change the attitude towards himself.
« What, forgive those who ruined my life"," Many will say and will be wrong. No one causes a person to look for the numbers of the former classmates who humiliated him, call them to meet, try to make friends. Such radicalism is superfluous. We are talking about throwing negative from your head. For this, it will be likely to remember much of what happened in past years.
High school students who hide a briefcase or threw a new pencil into the window. Nasty neighbor girl, challenged at meetings. First love, in response to recognition contemptuously launched in the face. Relatives comparing with more successful peers during family conversations. All this people keep in their heads, perhaps, often remembering and even coming up with revenge plans, clearly late for many years.
All that happened was peculiar experience, even if not the best. Yes, a similar attitude from others affected the time, but it is absolutely no reason to save, cherish them for many years and angry with those who allegedly destroyed all their lives. School offenders remained in the past. They have long grown, many have acquired their families and for sure they forgot about those who laughed at whom.
It is worth forgiving offenders. Children are cruel and try to assert themselves for someone else's expense, relatives were unlikely to evil, and the first beloved had the right not to experience any feeling in response. You can try to forgive the offenders, do not curse them and just forget. The more rational will spend time on those who are expensive. And, first of all, on yourself.
No, it does not mean that it is worth standing in front of the mirror and repeat " i am the finest person in this world, I am perfect, I don't have anyone better, I love myself so much"Although it will not be superfluous. Such actions often do not give effect, most often they are either just starting to mix and annoy, or can lead to a pseudo-free self-esteem. This is clearly not the main goal, right?
Take your body "It means treat him carefully, not to curse yourself for folding and stretching, not to torture it with diet in the style of" Apple for breakfast, lunch and dinner. " The body is one on, a person from him is inseparable. If still it does not work, you can try to accept at least that this is primarily a functional shell. By providing body care, a person does everything to "served" longer and more efficiently.
None of us choose the type of figure at birth, but everyone is able to make the body to be healthy and well-groomed. It is necessary to take care of him and take it as an integral part of themselves.
Not the best idea - to scroll through all the failures in my head, every time I say something like "I could / could do otherwise", "I spoiled everything / spoiled", "I am weak / weak" and similar. Learn about errors is great, but it does not apply to self-vaccination. It does not bring anything good - on the contrary, only destroys and takes energy.
Do not figure yourself for low self-esteem. It will not save it. No matter how paradoxically sounded, a person needs to accept the fact that while he still does not like himself. It so happened for any circumstances, but he intends to deal with it. This means the willingness to give a report in that he can make mistakes, indulge in disintegration, but at the same time do not edit herself. Why create obstacles to ourselves - in the world there are enough those who are ready to insert other sticks into the wheels. The main goal is to love yourself and gain harmony with your own body and thoughts, and not to suffer from severe thoughts and feeling of shame for any wrong step.
There will always be those who are sympathetic, and those who do not like for some reason. Do not be dependent on praise or criticism. Both are important to be able to listen, but to skip through the inner filter. Not other people decide how interesting their interlocutor is interesting and how he looks like today. Their opinion and self-satisfaction - all the same different things. When a person learns to listen primarily, and not familiar / friends / relatives, and understand what he likes in his own appearance and personality, becomes much easier to live.
Perhaps this is the most important rule. They argue that a person who does not like himself, more often draws attention to the best features of other people, comparing them with their worst qualities. The result is crying - the attitude towards ourselves is becoming even worse, the thoughts "I worse" appear in my head, "I am nothing worthy", "I amazing" and others who clearly do not help you love yourself.
It should not compare ourselves even with those who are in some area significantly lagging behind. It is better to focus on your life. It will not be superfluous, what exactly do you want. Every one is worthwhile to take care of herself, love themselves and live without regardless of the rest of people, without constant comparisons and experiences about their imperfections. Anyone can find some disadvantages, but this is just an indicator that he is a living man of flesh and blood.
It is worth understanding - the ideal does not exist, people with a flawless figure, leather and features are only on the pages of glossy magazines, and the smartest on this planet sometimes feel fools. Objectively, all people simply differ from each other, there is no one's best or worse.
If a person wants to set up those who surround people against himself, then the stories about what he is ugly, stupid and insecure in himself - a great solution. However, hardly at least someone seeks to this. Speaking by others about their shortcomings, people "program" interlocutors for a certain attitude. Others believe the speaker; They are subconsciously convinced that a person knows himself better than everyone. And if you firmly only about the bad, others will be sure - in reality everything is so, and you should not even contact you.
This means forget that parents demanded or imposed familiar. If not attracting medicine, then what's the point of finishing the appropriate university and to engage in an unloved business? The same goes and. Even if someone laughs at the fact that the person in adulthood sculpts from plasticine, glitters the models of the ships and looks at the cartoons, you just should not pay attention. The occupation brings pleasure, and this is the main thing. There is no need to chase behind the fashion, imitate someone, doing what to turn. It is important to do everything in order for you to be comfortable and interesting.
People often do not think about what actions are behind the thoughts "I can't endure myself." Despite this "dislike", the majority continue to prepare their meals, care for themselves, choose suitable clothes (hardly someone will come out in the cold in a thin jacket or in the summer in the fur coat). People will not specifically watch the films that they do not like, but will choose a movie in the shower. They try to see them more often with those who are sympathetic to them, and avoid unpleasant people. It is care, and it can be called one of. If everyone already loves himself, then where in the head of thought about the opposite?
Each of us is a sea of \u200b\u200bopportunities, plans and desires. It is necessary to start with understanding how to love yourself. You make the first and already a significant step to ensure that your life becomes much better. Absolutely everything in this world is worthy to be loved and happy. And you are definitely no exception.